I mean…I didn’t go anywhere…at all… but I haven’t been posting. I’ve just been too busy with real life to post. So, I have been trying to switch my diet the last couple weeks and today I saw that I’m at 242. Not great but making progress. I was down to 236 for a minute there but apparently that was just water weight, or I sabotaged it by eating a whole pizza to celebrate. By the way, isn’t it kind of retarded to say, “It’s water weight?” I mean, we’re like 60% water so it’s kind of unavoidable that it’s water weight. What are some other options? “Hey guys! I just lost like 10% bone weight and I’m feeling great! Who needs metatarsals?!” Well, in any case I’m trying to use the new diet options as guidelines to rethink how I eat, really re-teach myself. I’m certainly not going to be claiming flawless victory but I think a slow re-education process on a sustainable diet is a lot more effective than plunging into the abyss of trend diets. Tonight’s delicious shrimp po-boys were probably not a shining example but at least they were on whole wheat rolls. As always, I’ll strive to live better tomorrow.
Not much of an update today. I’ve been very busy with some events this week and some new projects at work. I still haven’t remembered to capture my weight to see if the diet is working. I’ve slipped up a couple of meals but overall it’s going well and I’m getting better at following the plan. I’ve worked out every morning this week so that’s been going well. It has been tough getting up at 4:45am, working out for an hour, being at work until 5:15pm and then either watching the kid for the next few hours or going to an after work event. The combination of schedule change, long hours, and not getting to see my wife much this week has made for a long three days. Ha, when I typed three days I realized how sad this whole post is. THREE DAYS? Big frickin’ deal…what a whiny baby. I’m going to stop bitching, take out the garbage, get my ass to bed and do this thing in the morning. See you in two more days.
I didn’t remember to weigh myself this morning at 5am before I went to workout. The weigh in is kind of important because we’ve been following a new diet pretty closely and I need to see if it’s working. I haven’t made any massive changes to my exercise program but this week I’m committed to working out every morning. Tomorrow morning is yoga which will hopefully be a little easier on me than the Tabata class I went to this morning. I’ve also learned that I cannot eat massive amounts of garlic the night before and fiber the morning of a big workout without penalty. Garlic and my stomach don’t get along. I actually thought I was going to throw up and I NEVER throw up. I found that in order to combat the nausea I had to relieve pressure somewhere and…well…fortunately the bathroom handled the situation; twice. I made the best of it and got back to the workout as quick as I could. On the upside, I found that I not only felt better physically after the morning workout, I also felt like I’d already accomplished something. 7 am and I could already check off one of my goals for the day…twice.
Tomorrow morning I’ll be eating lite and packing the rest of my breakfast to go.
This. This is what I’m combating. You know what the worst part is? I don’t even have it as bad as some people. My wife works in a dietary hell. People around her are constantly eating candy, getting greasy burgers or pizza for lunch, or even bringing in frozen custard! This, however is not about her. This is about my attempt to stick to my new plan. I hate to call it a diet because of the connotations. This is going to be the new way that I eat. Soon, it will become a habit and eating healthy will be normal instead of the exception. I’ve decided to focus on eating (since I do it all the time anyway) instead of exercise (which I can hardly seem to get myself to do at all). Pretty clever when I put it like that, huh? I will never be able to burn as many calories exercising as I’m capable of consuming so I’m renewing my focus on the kitchen.
Specifically I’m focused on portion size. See, I already like to eat vegetables and fruit. I don’t mind healthier cuts of meat and I think I’m finally becoming comfortable with cooking and eating fish. Sushi really helped with that (this is fish?!). I’m not saying that I don’t eat donuts, ice cream, cookies, etc. on occasion or even a giant greasy cheeseburger but that’s not a daily occurrence for me. Well…okay, so maybe it was nearly daily, not the burger, but something. I don’t think that was my main pitfall though. I think it’s that when I eat something as innocuous as a salad I eat a massive fucking salad. Even with a reasonable dose of dressing that is a ton of calories…from a salad!!! So I’ve adopted a meal plan with a lot of options but each meal is pretty specific about the portion sizes. So guess what ISN’T part of the meal plan.
That WAS however sitting in the break room. It was sitting in the break room for hours like some kind of untouchable holy grail of donut-dom. Every time I went in there for a coffee or a water it was staring at me, taunting me. I grabbed a yogurt out of the fridge…I stared at the donut, I studied it…I began to visualize myself in front of an altar, carrying a bag of sand and wearing a whip and fedora. I decided to finish my yogurt instead of dodging a volley of poisonous darts and a boulder.
Just as a I walked out of the break room I could swear I saw a single tear roll down that peep’s cheek.
Short but sweet. I’m tired and I’m tired of feeling like crap. I’ve wanted to eat better and exercise to look better, to have my clothes fit better, to be able to play volleyball better. I think what is finally going to motivate me to real change is that I’m now associating my diet with actually just feeling like shit all the time. I think my diet is making me tired. I think my diet is making me feel sick and weak all day. I think my diet is poisoning me and making my stomach hurt. I think I’m done putting up with it.
Today, I ate bran cereal. Today, I ate like a god damned adult.
St. Pat’s has got me in slow motion. I’m sure all the beer and whiskey I drank and all of the food I ate really put me ahead of the curve on my fitness journey.
Maybe if you consider all of the time I spent the next day shitting my brains out due to an over exuberant consumption of ghost chili seasoned hot wings and then the follow up mistake of blazing hot leftovers for lunch, you could argue that I probably broke even weight wise. Is there such a thing as “crying like a man” while on the toilet? Well, is there!?